I heard stories of abuse and witnessed some fights, so I don’t know how they stay married!

Now, you know why he did what did!

A Narc is the cake that cannot be unbaked, they can’t help themselves no matter what. We can’t ever expect that they would change somehow.

I’m amazed that two great Narcs could stay married, usually they’d fight their teeth and nails off to take an upper hand…

But this big world has infinite types of personality and their subtle variations, what do I know?!

One of my previous LO’s was a Greater Narcissist married to another Greater Narcissist, from what I see here. Both of them are inclined to punish people…and at least one of them still stalks me online, 14 years after we broke things off. And for five years, I thought that LO was the most awesome person ever.

Anna,

I’ve identified Mom as a Lesser, Somatic Narc, which fits her quite well and I can never go total NC with her, until she leaves this world. Every single time I had to deal with her, I was pushed to the state of irritability and then ultimate anger! She did not care, and sometimes, seemed to have enjoyed it. 😡

My LO #6 is a midrange, type B (A or B category is not listed in this article), Cerebral Narc. He and Mom are two people I ever punched on their face, due to their unbearable verbal and physical abuses of me. I don’t have an ounce of regret for doing so!😡 Nowadays, the idea of LO #6 does not arose any sensations in me, which indicates that I’m healed from LE#6.

Two Springs ago, I thought LO #7 is a Midrange, type A, Elite Narc and verbally accused him so in writing. But some of his behaviors did not quite fit the definition (takes time to observe and confirm). After reading DrL’s article on Sensor, I realize he’s more of a Sensor, not Narc. So I apologized to him and “retrieved” that letter.

Having 35% of narcissistic traits, I am inclined to fight back rather than just being a victim. With the information provided in this insightful article, I’ve learned how to recognize and deal with Narcs, such as Mom, who seems unable to feel even for herself, except a sense of bottomless insecurity, which then arose my 65% empathic traits. I was often caught in between two traits, thus suffer swings between two polarities.

My challenge is keep her out of my mind as much as possible and maintain a maximum equilibrium when I have to realistically help her out for logistic matters.

*********

Regardless of schools and cadres, all narcissists, in various forms and degrees, consciously and instinctively exhibit:

Status
Entitlement
Omnipotence
Superiority
Lack of Empathy
Attention Seeking
Lack of Accountability
This lack of accountability and responsibility manifests in many different ways. This includes the following: –

Behaving as we want
Ignoring rules and conventions
Never accepting blame
Never apologising
Not helping in any scenario be it work or home
Having no regard for legal process
Making and then breaking agreements
Failing to pay in respect of obligations such as bills, child support and spousal maintenance
Repeatedly lying to maintain the avoidance of accountability
Challenging those in authority

Blame Shifting
Blame shifting enables me to achieve several things: –

A method of defence from your attacks against me and rejecting criticism
A method of control by asserting that I am in the right and you are wrong
A further method of wearing you down by projecting the blame on to you which is something you cannot understand yet you will keep trying to make me see the incorrect nature of what I am doing, to no avail
Provocation so that you react and provide me with that all-important fuel.

**************
With sufficient insight, full knowledge of an Ultra narcissist, any confusions and puzzling deeds of narcissists from any school or cadre or a combination, could be logically explained and intellectually entertained.

******

The End

The Elite Narcissist

The final category of narcissist is the Elite Narcissist. He combines both the looks and physical supremacy of the Somatic Narcissist with the intellect and spoken charm of the Cerebral Narcissist. The Elite Narcissist will talk you into bed and deliver as well. He will have your mind aroused and then your body. He may not be quite the sexual champion that the Somatic Narcissist is but he is no slouch. He will look after himself and be trim and athletic if not ripped and buff, but such a look is not beyond him. He may not have the total cranial magnificence of the Cerebral Narcissist but again he is no dribbling idiot. He has plenty of intelligence and wit, which he puts to good use. This combination of intelligence and looks creates the deadliest narcissist because he can use both to charm and seduce you and then use both to devalue you. Hence, he is categorised as an elite member of our club.

The Elite Narcissist is interested in sex because he recognises that sex comes in many forms. He knows that it can be the sensual whisper in your ear or the raunchy text messaging he sends you. He knows it is the athletic and sudden performance in a penthouse suit and the gentle, tender lovemaking that you crave. He has none of the disgust for the sexual act like the Cerebral Narcissist and does not rely solely on physical domination like the Somatic Narcissist. He is able to combine both worlds and straddle the same in order to exact his manipulations. Where the mouth leads, his body will follow and you are subjected to the one-two combination. Whilst the Victim Narcissist needs the mothering empath, the Cerebral Narcissist needs the disciple empath who worships at this temple of knowledge, the Somatic Narcissist needs the empath who is swayed by looks, and the Elite Narcissist just needs somebody with empathic qualities. They may not be a complete empath but the everyday charm and attractiveness of the Elite Narcissist will seduce someone who may have lower empathic qualities than normal and this in turn provides the Elite Narcissist with access to a larger pool of potential victims. Naturally, the Elite Narcissist will be using sex (in word and deed) to ensnare an empath, a super-empath or a co-dependent but he is able to mine fuel from some of the lesser prospects. The Elite Narcissist will use the spoken charm and knowledge of the Cerebral Narcissist and meld it with the sexual physical allure of the Somatic Narcissist to create a very potent sexual magnet indeed. Few can resist him and the sex he grants is gratifying on many levels. For the same reason, when the Elite Narcissist commences the devaluation, his victim is subjected to a further double whammy as spoken word and physical act are used against her. The effect is devastating.

The Elite Narcissist stalks the world with his double-barrel of capabilities to charm and ensnare and when the time is right he can turn that double-barrel on his victim and unleash not one but two forms of devastating devaluation. This cadre of narcissists is very difficult to resist. Although it may look like an oxymoron there are Mid-Range Elite Narcissists. This means that those who combine looks and intellect do so with particular effect but they do so without the drive and malign intent of those from the Greater school. They perform effective Hoovers, which are sustained and intense because the Elite Narcissist has combined two cadres of narcissists, which gives him or her more tools to apply, more manipulations to administer and a greater prospect of ensnaring their victim once again. Those that are without the malign influence will move on to a different victim should the current target exhibit a slavish devotion to No Contact.

Ultimately there is the Greater Elite Narcissist. This malevolent and malign creature will seduce you with a double whammy of looks and intellect, whisk you off your feet in seconds and be the toast of everyone you know. You will be regarded as having secured the golden ticket to the golden period and in utter nirvana. As ever the higher you climb the greater your fall and when the Greater Elite Narcissist unleashes his or campaign of vitriolic devaluation against you, you will need to get far away if you are ever to escape him or her. The Grand Hoover deployed by the Greater Elite Narcissist is of hurricane force as every conceivable method of manipulation is hurled at you in a fearsome bid to cause you to capitulate. Even if, somehow, you manage to survive the Grand Hoover you will be subjected to repeated attempts to draw you back in. No matter what other fuel the Greater Elite Narcissist has acquired he or she will still dedicate time and energy to your downfall. They will not rest until one day they have secured that potent Hoover fuel from you. It may be tomorrow or in fifteen years but they will always come after you.

The Somatic Narcissist

Here comes the gym bunny that has a bottom so tight it will bounce off the walls before he bounces you all around the bedroom. The Somatic Narcissist is obsessed with his or her physical appearance. They diet fastidiously, put the hours in at the gym, select the clothing which allows them to flaunt their bodies and spend a lot of time with their favourite person; their reflection in the mirror. They look for reactions of admiration to their beauty, their physical perfection, their muscular appearance and smart and attractive appearances. The Somatic Narcissist likes to demonstrate athletic ability by showing his body can throw the farthest, run the fastest or dive the deepest. The appearance of his or her body and what can be achieved through it (strength, flexibility, and endurance) are what matter in order to draw fuel from their victims.

This fixation with the body means that the arena of sex is hugely important to the Somatic Narcissist. He wants to look terrific whilst having sex so you coo and purr over that finely honed body, the impressive biceps and rigid six-pack. Not only that but look at how he can have sex for a long time as he flips you from this position to the next like a piece of meat. His stamina is legendary, his ability to get you and him into all manner of positions should be respected and admired and all of this is achieved whilst looking like a Greek god. Whereas the Cerebral Narcissist uses his intellect to conquer, the Somatic Narcissist uses his or her body to achieve the same outcome. His body is designed for admiration and where better to achieve that than in the bedroom.

The Somatic Narcissist will also demonstrate the legendary hypocrisy for which we are known. You must not compete with him in any way in the looks department but you are expected to look your best because you are an extension of him. You must not gain weight, have bad skin, wear ill-fitting clothes or forget to shave your legs. You must walk the tightrope of ensuring that you fit in with his image of bodily perfection whilst at the same time not pulling the spotlight away from him. The Somatic Narcissist will excel during the seductive stage because the twin allure of somebody looking so good and performing so brilliantly between the sheets will blow you away. You will receive premium quality sex, amazing orgasms, grade A sexual encounters. His stamina is vast, his eagerness and readiness to copulate is staggering and you will be the beneficiary in all of this. This is just a fortunate coincidence for you because as with all types of our kind, the Somatic Narcissist is just after your fuel. You may not regard this as such a problem during the seduction phase. So what if he gets off on your screams of pleasure and your repeated appreciation of those defined forearms and pectoral muscles, you are being given the sexual time of your life, he deserves the praise doesn’t he? Naturally, this is how we want it to work. You give us the fuel, have no realisation what you are doing, and therefore have no concern, so consequently you embrace it wholeheartedly.

When the devaluation occurs, you can expect the Somatic Narcissist to maintain still a rampant sexual appetite but the last thing on his mind will be making you purr with pleasure. You will be taken against your will, subjected to lengthy sexual hammerings as he focuses on how brilliant he is at lasting so long, how glorious his taut muscles look as he ploughs away at you. There is no consideration for whether you are enjoying yourself or even if you are being physically hurt because all that matters to him is how good he looks and how masterful he is in the sack. If you were to vanish from beneath him, he would barely notice. The Somatic Narcissist is in effect having sex with himself. He is so fine to look at that he would eat himself if he could and similarly he would engage in sexual intercourse with himself if that were a possibility. Masturbation ranks high with narcissists anyway but this action is even more prevalent with the Somatic Narcissist. He will position himself in front of a mirror and as he plays with himself, he will admire how he looks and this reinforces his need for you to admire him also. The Somatic Narcissist will bombard you with pictures of his buff body and his penis during the seduction stage. He will also do this with online strangers in order to gain their admiration also.

Exhibiting their physicality is necessary for the somatic variety of our kind. Accordingly, you can expect sexual gymnastics during the seduction phase and then to be slapped, smacked, bent over, throttled, pinned down and all other manifestations of physical dominance. The fear in your eyes as he pins you to the bed and takes what he regards as his only goes to fuel him further. Any kind of treatment, which emphasises his physical prowess and superiority, will be meted out in the sexual arena and invariably you will suffer consequently. You can expect to be humiliated, dominated and shoved around by the Somatic Narcissist during devaluation. You are little more than a blow-up doll to him, which is to be manipulated into all manner of positions all in order to make him look magnificent. You are expected to be grateful for the sexual pounding you have received and if your praise is not forthcoming then expect the consequences, as this inherent criticism will ignite his rage. Rather than rely on withering put downs and caustic comments, the Somatic Narcissist will lash out physically, again underpinning his physical superiority whilst storing away your transgression for use in the sexual arena at a later date. The Somatic Narcissist will insist on bondage, your subjugation being a natural consequence of his superiority. You will be bent over his knee and smacked with his hand or a cane. I know of one narcissist who would apply nettles to his scrotum because he explained it gave him a massive and sustained erection, notwithstanding the pain and he expected his victim to endure the application of those nettles to her nipples, bottom and thighs in order to heighten her sexual experience also. In the hands of the Somatic Narcissist, sex is a highly charged weapon. It is with the Somatic Narcissist that you will experience the greatest highs during the sexual seduction and the humiliating and hurtful lows when the devaluation occurs.

The Somatic Narcissist lets his or body do the talking and therefore words whilst used by the Somatic Narcissist are used less extensively and with less impact than if they were being wielded by the Cerebral Narcissist. You will find that much of what the Somatic Narcissist will say will revolve around how magnificent he or she looks, material items, his or new car, the new house they have bought or the new extension to a house. The material and the tangible are what matter to the Somatic Narcissist and accordingly money, expensive items and events are high on their list of priorities. It is all about how it looks. They like to appear magnificent both in their appearance and the environment in which they operate. They are the epitome of showing off the shiny and the sparkling as part of their approach to seduce and beguile you. During devaluation you can expect all of the beautiful things to be withdrawn and for their words to focus on how you have lost your looks, gained weight, how you are not caring about your appearance anymore, that you are failing to keep the house tidy and such like. Much of what the Somatic Narcissist will say will revolve around appearance and presentation.

There are no Lesser Somatic Narcissists. Their lack of interest in their environment, lower functioning and general poor physical appearance and health do not equate to the Somatic Narcissist. The Mid Range Somatic Narcissist is still rampant in their sexual appetite, their desire for all to look beautiful and their obsession with looks. They will however lack the drive and malignant nature of the Greater Somatic Narcissist. This creature is a lady-killer or a seductive siren. Utterly vain, compellingly beautiful or handsome he or she knows that to look upon them is to look upon the beauty of heaven. They regard their beauty as captivating. They turn heads, stop traffic and have people fall in love with them from the moment they set eyes on him or her. The Greater Somatic Narcissist has an incredible sexual appetite from the get go and uses this to stun their victim into submission. By equal turns they will wrench it away from their victim once the malign nature is unleashed. The Greater Somatic Narcissist is a cruel creature, entranced by their own image and someone who is all too ready to lambaste others who fall beneath their ridiculously high standards. The Greater Somatic Narcissist is an occasion when beauty has never been so ugly.

The Cerebral Narcissist

The Cerebral Narcissist has a limited interest in sex, certainly of the physical variety. This type of narcissist prefers to flaunt his brilliant intellect as the method by which he seduces his victims. He has little interest in engaging in actual sexual relations because that is not his forte. He has no interest in a remarkable physical appearance because he has no need for it. He need not be toned or slim although it does not always follow that the Cerebral Narcissist neglects his body to the extent that he becomes some kind of slob. After all, he has suitable awareness and intellect to understand the problems arising from the neglect of his health. He will not be an Adonis but it does not follow that he will be morbidly obese and of questionable hygiene habits. His magnificence stems from his high intellect, his amazing memory and his capacity for complexity. It is the repeated tales of academic achievement, cerebral power and scintillating intellect, which are used to wow and overpower the resistance of his victims. The Cerebral Narcissist is well read, extensively schooled and excels in showering all who will listen with evidence of his intellectual superiority. Such brilliance proves highly attractive to a certain section of empathic individuals who wish to engage a brain that is the size of a planet. The conversations, albeit one-sided, are nevertheless stimulating and engrossing. There is never a silence for the Cerebral Narcissist is always primed to provide you with an interesting fact about the champagne that you are both drinking and a historical anecdote concerning the Ponte Vecchio that you are walking over. This walking almanac of facts and opinions is quite dazzling and vastly appealing to some.

The Cerebral Narcissist will engage in sex periodically if the intellectual avenue becomes exhausted. The sex will not be fulfilling for either party owing to the fact that the Cerebral Narcissist is neither interested in this nor particularly proficient. It will be done when the intellectual charm is not working as well as it once did and is often done out of a sense of obligation. The Cerebral Narcissist will feel that every so often he is obligated to discharge his marital responsibilities by engaging in sex with his partner. This is purely done in order to maintain the happiness of the other individual during the golden period and during devaluation, the Cerebral Narcissist will effectively become frigid, as he will have no interest or sense of obligation to engage in sexual relations with his victim.

The Cerebral Narcissist however will often talk about sex during the seduction stage. Words are very much the weapons of the narcissist and especially so with the higher functioning of our kin. The Cerebral Narcissist although uninterested in the physical side of sex, will still wish to show off his vast knowledge of the subject. He will want to regale you with his knowledge of sexual literature, sexual analysis and sexual awareness. He will have read many books about the subject. That is not to enable him to be a better lover but to allow him to be a better speaker about being a lover. The Cerebral Narcissist will engage in seductive letter writing, often of the old school romantic variety. He will tease and titillate using text messages and telephone messages. He will quite readily, purely for the purpose of seduction, talk dirty down the telephone to you whilst you masturbate. He may tell you he is doing the same but he will not as the physical sensation is of no interest to him. What arouses him is the intellectual power he has in being able to use his lexicon of love to arouse you down the telephone line. Your noises of appreciation and compliments provide him with the fuel he requires, he demonstrates how knowledgeable he is about sex by talking in this manner and he has the added bonus of not having to engage in the actual act. This suits the Cerebral Narcissist most well. There will be plenty of opportunities for him to exhibit his wide knowledge of sexual practices in order to heighten your anticipation and to wow you as you listen wide-eyed to his explanations of certain techniques and behaviours and what they achieve. He knows all about sex but he certainly does not put it into practice. That is beneath him. In the way that those with a suntan were once looked down upon because this denoted being a manual labourer, the Cerebral Narcissist looks down on the actual sexual act as beneath him. Why engage in something so crass, something so animalistic and frankly barbaric (other than out of a sense of occasional duty to maintain the façade of the golden period) when one can use the pristine cleanliness of a beautiful mind to gain that all-important fuel? I have a cousin who is a little younger than I am. He is the offspring of my Uncle Peter (who you can read all about in Fury) and has been created in the same way as Uncle Peter but he does not have the interest in sex preferring to use his excellent academic credentials and brilliant mind to effect his acquisition of fuel. My cousin finds the act of sexual intercourse so abhorrent because he sees it as beneath someone with such a fine mind as him that on the few occasions he has been compelled to do it, he runs off to the bathroom afterwards and vomits. Not only does he not like the intimacy that comes with the act of coitus but the noise, the fluids, the interaction of parts from which one urinates all disgusts him as he has told me, to my amusement, on many occasions.

The Cerebral Narcissist places significant weight on his intellect being lauded and recognised. He excels in sitting and passing exams and will have a string of qualifications in order to brow beat any opponent before the debate has begun. He is more qualified ergo he is superior. The Cerebral Narcissist places considerable value on his intellectual achievements being recognised and any failure to do so will ignite his fury. He cannot stand ignorance. He will correct people when they speak, revel in revealing they are incorrect about a fact and love nothing more than to hold forth and argue with people. For him more than any other cadre narcissist words are the essence of his being. He loves the economy that accompanies their use, he delights in the effect they have both in seduction and devaluation and his superiority must always be recognised.

The Cerebral Narcissist, in the same way that he is disinterested in his body and the sexual arena, has no interest in physical abuse. It will take a severe loss of control, possibly on entering the Chaos Mode or alternatively following sustained criticisms whereby the fury is ignited, for a Cerebral Narcissist to use physical abuse against his or her victim. It will tend to be grabbing, pushing and holding down as opposed to punching and kicking. The Cerebral Narcissist is also aware of the evidential ramifications arising from physical abuse and is too clever (unless control has been lost) to engage in such behaviours. He regards physical abuse as beneath him, preferring to engage in the fine art of emotional and psychological abuse.

The Cerebral Narcissist is an extensive user of Lieutenants. His innate charisma combined with his intellect enables him to recruit and manipulate others. Since he shuns the body, he prefers others to do the donkeywork and is entirely content to recruit them to do this on his behalf. He will carry out much of his work by proxy, seeing it as beneath him to become involved in the minutiae of the abuse but rather he is there to plan it, orchestrate it and command it.

Naturally you will not find any Lesser Cerebral Narcissists. They are drawn both from the ranks of the Mid-Range school whereby the Cerebral Narcissist will exhibit all the traits explained above but will lack any malign intent. Those Greater Cerebral Narcissists are dangerous individuals. Their higher function combined with their emphasis on the mind mean that all manner of manipulative tools will be used against you during seduction and devaluation. The Greater Cerebral Narcissist is Machiavellian in approach, covert and extremely manipulative. All narcissists lie but he is the Chief of Lies. Words are his speciality and it follows that in unleashing his malevolent campaign against you lies will be used extensively. In fact, it is fair to say that he will issue more lies than truth and thus makes for a most dangerous opponent.

Victim Narcissist

All narcissists play at being the victim at some point but not all narcissists are of the victim variety. Non-victim narcissists are content to use their perception of victim hood by virtue of manipulating their targets and victims. Furthermore, they will use their perception as being a victim for the purposes of driving their desire to act against people. Non-victim narcissists use the concept of being a victim as a device and place it on themselves and remove it at will like a mask. True Victim Narcissists adopt a permanent state of being a victim both in outlook and behaviour. They regard the world as a place whereby they have been denied their rightful inheritance of looks, intellect, wealth and power and instead they rely on others to provide it to them instead. The Victim Narcissist will look to others to repair his failings such as lack of money, lack of home, lack of job and overall lack of competence. He will not look for his narcissism to be fixed because he is unaware of what he is since the Victim Narcissist is low functioning and can only be from the school of lesser narcissism.

Should you become entangled with a Victim Narcissist he or she may lash out at you. Indeed, owing to their low functioning, physical abuse ranks higher as a manipulative tool with these individuals. This lashing out however is not borne of a malign nature because the Victim Narcissist lacks both the capability and desire to behave in a malign way. You will not find a Victim Narcissist who is malign.

The Victim Variety of narcissists is somebody who lacks the body and looks of obsession of the Somatic Narcissist and also lacks the intellect of the Cerebral Narcissist. He is typically a low-functioning narcissist since he does not inherently have the wit or intelligence to seduce his victims through words and demonstrations of intellectual brilliance. Neither does he have the drive or discipline to take care of himself physically, dress well, and have a rigorous hygiene and looks maintenance ritual. He is however a narcissist and needs to seduce his victims all the same and he does so by presenting as a victim who needs looking after.

They also do not tend to love-bomb hugely effectively but instead they merely hide their savage side in the initial stages so they are at least not off-putting. I also tend to think that they draw their victims in not by a show of supremacy and strength but rather by eliciting sympathy. They play on the empath’s sense of caring and nurturing and present as a victim in order to be mothered by the empath. Accordingly, they do not exhibit the same degree of allure, charisma and all around sparkling brilliance as we do. They are still able to draw people in because there are caregivers who do not care so much about how someone looks and so on, but feel sorry for them and want to care for them and make them better. Similarly, in sexual matters they exhibit no brilliance between the sheets and may even demonstrate incompetence in order to draw further sympathy and invite the caring empath to teach them to be better. These narcissists are entirely self-centred and lack the charm and tools to draw their victims in with brilliance and magnificence. These narcissists do tend to be from the lower functioning variety that is not especially good at anything. They will provide some embellishment but again because they are low-functioning they will lack the intelligence, guile and wit to conjure up fantastic tales of achievement and accomplishment. Instead, they need to keep their abusive streak in check, something they are able to do but they need to find some other way of drawing in their victims. They cannot hold up anything shiny or sparkling in the way that most of our kind does. Instead, they do the reverse. What they exhibit is rusting, battered and dented but they do it in a “Shucks look at me, I am in a bit of a mess, and I need someone to help me out, would that kind person be you?” They present their victim status very early on and this will not be attractive to many people but it will draw certain people to them, those who want to care for them, mother them and make them become better. The Victim Narcissist often lacks any financial resources, may not be employed (and if he or she is they will be in a low-skilled occupation) and will relish the opportunity to forgo working so that the victim can support them. This type of narcissist has no interest in status unlike say an Elite Narcissist, but instead their sense of entitlement will outweigh any concerns about status. You should look after them if you say you love them. They are entitled to be cared for by reason of the fact that they are victims. They will regard themselves as a bit of a rough diamond, which needs polishing up and the empathic victim they have selected is just the person to do this.

Since this type of narcissist does not rely on being a shining beacon of attraction to people but rather a battered old vehicle which needs some tender loving care he sees no reason to let the flattery flow. There is little in the way of grandiose gestures or extravagance. Instead he will just play the victim card repeatedly in order to keep that empath looking after him and drawn to him. He is appreciative of the attention and caring and why not? He is gaining fuel but is also being looked after. He will probably not work and rely on the financial ability of the victim in that respect. He will help a little, just enough to avoid reprimand and enough to draw thanks from the empath. He keeps the abuse in check and therefore whilst never over the top in word or gesture he is pleasant enough. He certainly is not horrible. His gratitude at being looked after and given attention by the empath satisfies the empath and they are willing to overlook the deficiencies because they feel good about taking care of this person.

Since this type of narcissist has no need to look good, sound great and shine this attitude pervades into the sexual arena. He need not make his partner feel orgasmic and in a higher place. She will just be grateful he made the effort. In that way that all empaths make excuses she will regard his ineptitude between the sheets as just another item that makes him seem lovable and charming. Okay, he is not the world’s best lover, he is not even in the top thousand but he tries and that is all the empath in such a relationship, as this, will want. The empath may just be happy to have someone to share his or her life with and care for. They are not scintillating like me and others that are like me. Accordingly, therefore being a sexual superstar is unnecessary. As I have mentioned in other writings, we are not only creatures of economy but we have been created economically. We do not like to expend energy unnecessarily. It is also the case that if it is not going to gather us fuel we do not need it. In the way that we are not furnished with empathy or the capacity for the remorse, because they do not gather any fuel for us, the low functioning Victim Narcissist is not blessed with sexual prowess, as it serves no purpose for him. He will only seek out those that want to mother him. He will not seek out those who want to be taken to sexual nirvana repeatedly. He will not need to use this sexual weapon to charm his victim because his helplessness and victim status does that for him instead. Accordingly, many of these low functioning narcissists either have little interest in sex or are useless at it.

Sex is still a material factor in the relationship with the Victim Variety because he will exhibit incompetence in this arena so that the caring empath feels sorry for him and will even feel a need to try and teach him. Some narcissists who are of the Victim Variety will go even further and demonstrate varying degrees of frigidity. Once again, this is designed to draw out sympathy from the empath. It is also done to garner sexual attention as well. By exhibiting no interest or little interest in sex or even appearing impotent, the desire to fix will be overwhelming for the empath who will do her best to try to light the fire of desire in this low-functioning narcissist.

The Victim Narcissist will often present with illnesses and ailments. He does not enjoy good health, which is a consequence of him rarely partaking in exercise and his inability to look after himself properly in terms of nutrition and/or hygiene. Not only will he appear with numerous ongoing physical health complaints he will typically invent additional ones in order to draw sympathy and evade having to do things. He has repeated bad backs, injured knees, depression, headache and the like. He is a malingerer and if he cannot point to one of his many ongoing complaints he will readily invent one in order to ensure that the empathic individual that he has ensnared will continue to care for him. You can guarantee that the Victim Narcissist when performing a Hoover (albeit of low intensity and not for a sustained period) will always use the Emergency Power Play and/or the Victim Power Play as part of his portfolio.

You will always find Lesser Victim Narcissists but never any Greater Victim Narcissists. There are occasional Mid-Range Victim Narcissists but the vast majority hail from the lesser school.

Continuing the article —

Identifying Your Narcissist

The classification of the type of narcissist that you have become entangled with is dependent on their level of functioning, desire to crush you, fixation with the mind and dedication to the body. The level of functioning will apply to considerations of mind and also the body. I am familiar with these classes of narcissist through my observation of my kind and interaction with those that form part of my family and background. In considering how to identify your narcissist you need to have regard to the two categories from which they may be drawn.

Firstly, there are the relevant schools. This covers the Lesser, Mid-Range or Greater Narcissist. Then there are secondly the cadres, which are applicable to the Victim, Somatic, Cerebral and Elite Narcissists. A narcissist is drawn from both a school and a cadre but there are some combinations, which cannot be achieved, as they are mutually opposite.

The Schools

The Lesser Narcissist

The Lesser Narcissist is typically low functioning. He is unlikely to know what he is and will reject any suggestion that he is a narcissist, instead retreating into blame shifting and projection. The Lesser Narcissist has just as great a need for fuel as any other narcissist but will always take the path of least resistance to obtain this fuel. The Hoover from a Lesser Narcissist will neither be intense nor will it be sustained once he recognises that he is facing considerable resistance. He will instead seek out a new primary source of fuel instead as this will be easier. He has no desire to seek near annihilation of his victims and instead once discarded only Hoover should they present the opportunity on a plate for him to do so. The Lesser Narcissist has lower energy levels and is very much a creature of economy. He sees little to be gained in higher stake approaches even if the promise of the fuel should such an approach succeed be fantastic. He would rather find an easier route. It is not the case that he or she is not a risk-taker but it turns on the fact that they cannot in fact be bothered to chase difficult (albeit more rewarding fuel) and will instead take it from easy sources. They classically always look for the low hanging fruit.

The Mid-Range Narcissist

The Mid-Range Narcissist possesses a reasonable level of functioning. He will work harder than a Lesser Narcissist to achieve his aims and will push harder when Hoovering but he lacks the superior attributes of the Greater Narcissist and does not share the malign intent that the Greater Narcissist is known for. The Mid-Range Narcissist will engage in sustained Hoovers and will look further a field than a Lesser Narcissist to do so. The Mid-Range Narcissist is usually identified by reason of omission. They do not exhibit the incandescent fury, malign intent and utter driven nature of the Greater Narcissist. By contrast they do not either show the economy of approach nor the lesser functioning ability of the Lesser Narcissist. Accordingly, if the narcissist that you have entangled with does not show any Lesser or Greater traits then you can safely place him or her as a Mid-Range Narcissist.

The Greater Narcissist

The Greater Narcissist (sometimes known as the malign narcissist) is a high functioning individual. This narcissist will be well aware of what he or she does, the nature of its impact yet has no regard for the chaos caused or the collateral damage generated. The Greater Narcissist can be identified by virtue of increased energy levels, the greater intensity of the Hoover, the sustaining of a longer period of Hoover and an all-pervading malevolence. The Greater Narcissist will look to crush his or her victim to near obliteration in the ruthless pursuit of punishment. The Lesser Narcissist has no interest in punishment. The Mid-Range will achieve punishment if little effort is required. The Greater Narcissist has punishment very much on his or her agenda and will readily expend considerable energies in achieving this so long as sufficient fuel exists to support such a campaign. The Greater Narcissist has a more expansive manipulative toolkit and is capable of wreaking extensive harm to those who cross his or her path. A Greater Narcissist, if he so chooses, could readily seduce a Lesser Narcissist although naturally such a step would be fuel-limited and the categories of empathic individual, super empathic individual and co-dependent are vastly preferred.

Turning to the cadres. By way of reminder there are four. Victim, Cerebral, Somatic and Elite. We address the Victim Narcissist first.